How It Turned Out...first glance

I'm still anxiously awaiting pics from the official photog, my talented friend Kathy, but in the meantime, my sis-in-law (oh, that's right, I have three now...my bro's wife:) came through w/ 300+ photos of the prep, rehearsal and wedding.  That she got them all uploaded to Photobucket by time I returned from my honeymoon is amazing.  Finally, a Guerrero that doesn't procrastinate. 

One of my dilemmas was what to have the flower girls do besides toss flower petals, which turned out to be  mad expensive, would have been a hassle to clean up and just seemed all around wasteful.  Oh, and the girls were intimidated by the idea of throwing flowers (perhaps because it really is a bit of an ritual, really).  As mentioned in an earlier post, I decided to turn them into bubble girls.  And look, it worked perfectly!  Ok, I know you can't really go wrong with adorable little girls in pretty dresses, but still happy with how it turned out. 

Another experiment that went well-- the mix & match dresses.  Must admit, I was sweating this one to the end, but it all came together nicely.  And not just because I was "high on wedding" that day;  looking at the pics, I'm still impressed with how cohesive it all looked.  Or maybe I'm just biased.  Still, I think having similar lengths, all strapless and a few other style commonalities tied together some otherwise very different dresses.  I liked that both the Elizabeths ended up in strapless silk chiffon and both the Jessicas in purple v-necks-- totally unplanned!

Was also incredibly happy with how the bouquets turned out.  You would have no idea that two hours  before the wedding I walked into the kitchen in sweats saying, "Oh, I guess I should pick out my flowers."  The second time I had this epiphany, 20 minutes later, I sounded a bit more nervous as I pointed out some of my favorites from the flowers The Moms had picked up from Costco.  (The flower growing yielded less than optimal results; Liz and I did pick some gorgeous wild flowers the day before the wedding-- unfortunately bees loved them, so they had to be positioned away from guests.)  After my hurried selection, I wandered off distracted by another project.  Next thing you know Christy and Liz had fun, summery bouquets ready for all.  Those two might possibly be magic.  Really, all of our friends & family were ROCK STARS that weekend.  Except for my sis, who was the Ace of Cakes.  Look out Duff!  The secret to a successful DIY wedding?  It is the old adage-- it's all in who you know!

Today's milestone is the ability to start obsessively checking weather reports, as the Sept 11 now falls within the range of the 10-day forecast at http://www.weather.com/.  The verdict?  It's going to be a hot one. 

Still, the chance of rain is small, so it looks like we are on for an outdoor celebration.  We'll just have to make sure to set up plenty of shaded spots and offer lots of water.  And it looks like I will definitely not make it through the entire reception in my gown.  All good things to know.

Shoe Love. All's Well That Ends Well.

The shoe hunt is OVER.  I have left no sole left unturned in my hunt for just the right glass slipper for the ball.  Careening from wedges, to kitten heels, to saying "what the heck" and pursuing the tall skinny heels that were calling my name to....a wonderful compromise. 

Nine West, satin, open-toe w/ a hidden platform and a nice thick heel that provide plenty of stability.  No sinking in the dirt for me!  Which is good, because it would be a shame to ruin these shoes.  The material is a a soft silvery white that I can wear again.  Not often, but we have the occasional black tie event at work.  I'll be ready for the next one.

It looks even better in real life, maybe I'll do our practice dance in them tomorrow. 

Let the Dancing Begin

Last night we began-- and ended-- our YouTube dance lessons.  After a few rounds of staring at our feet as we back-step, front-step side, now turn; we realized we'd look better doing the middle school shuffle (hands on partner's shoulder, ruler width apart, sway, sway) than nervously concentrating on a series of steps we had started practicing a week before the wedding. 

New plan:  dance a bit each night, keeping it super simple and practice throwing in the occassional spin.  Hopefully we won't be sick of John Legend by time the bid day rolls around!

Let Them Eat Gazpacho

I considered going to the beach with friends this weekend, but in a suprisingly practical turn, my son reminded me, "Mom, you are going to Hawaii for two weeks in two weeks-- you should stay home and take care of things." Ah, the wisdom of youth.


So get things done I will, one small victory at a time...such as, I finally committed to the items we will be ordering from Obrigado to supplement the self-catered portion of the reception:

• Paella-style orzo, with chorizo, tomoatoes, peas & spanish spices
• Corn-cilantro-tomato salad
• Gazpacho

A million little things may fall through the cracks, but at leat we will have gazpacho! :)  And music; I confirmed with Eddie Pasa, our multi-talented, one-man guitar act.  Beer, food, music, an officiant and a good man-- the basics are in place, at any rate.  Oh, and today is DRESS DAY, heading to the seamstress after work.  I get to see the gown sans train for the first time.  My ring should also be shipped today.  Baby steps, but in the right direction! 

Perfect Pair?

Of shoes, that is.  I hope!  Bought my fifth and hopefully final pair last night.  I loved the "Me Too" pair I'd picked up at Nordstrom's, but they were a teeny bit too tight and when I went to exchange them they'd run out of the next size up.  I'm willing to balance on my toes through the ceremony for the sake of heels, but not to have my toes go numb.  Also, the heels are thicker, so I shouldn't have to worry about sinking into the grass.  Sorry, fashion, only so much I'm willing to suffer for you.

Fingers crossed that the Nine West pair does the trick.  Hopefully I will be adding to the great online reviews that I read before purchasing.  Otherwise, I'm giving up and going barefoot!

The "Or" Chronicles

I had an ah-ha moment during a recent professional seminar.  It was based on Emergenetics concepts, one of those personality testing methods that examines how people think and wraps up your psyche with a bow.  While we did not take the full test, there were exercises to help determine your "thinking type."  No shock that I received the Conceptual label, defined as being creative but not overly organized.  Not the ah-ha moment.

My "oh my God, that's ME" epiphany came when the speaker talked about how different thinkers handle decision making.  Analytics make charts (which means I MUST have a tad of that working, I love me some lists!), etc, etc.  Conceptual thinkers, us poor saps, we are burdened by the ability to visualize 1,000 different outcomes, our creative little wheels unable to stop turning, we just keep saying, "What about.......?"  followed by "Or..."

Which is awesome, at first.  However, it can make decision making nearly impossible.  When this conceptual conundrum was explained, I laughed out loud.  How could this stranger see inside my head??  The speaker went on to say the solution is to turn to the structurally minded people in your life and ask them to help you pull the trigger.  Luckily, I'm marrying one of those.   

Wait, this story DOES relate to the wedding, really.  Because at no time has my "Or Syndrome" been more paralyzing than now.  I just bought my 4th pair of wedding shoes after looking at probably hundreds.  I built five websites.  I have six different versions of the menu.  (Di-- I'm counting on you, corn salad or Mediterranean potato salad?  Only you can stop the madness!).  I have yet to decide on vows, a reading or recessional song, for a wedding that is 16 days away.  I wake up screaming, "Or we could..." in the middle of the night.  At least the pending deadline will force some decisions.  That and the begging from poor Mr. "Can We Please Check This Off the List?"   It looks like opposites do attract-- thank goodness for me!

Longest List Ever

Went to our website today and saw "20 Days to Go."  Um...ACK!  We spent couple time compiling a comprehensive list of everything that  needs to happen between now and the wedding.  Not even counting decorating/set-up at the lake house, I filled up more than a sheet of paper, two-column.  Progress is slow going.  We did manage a trip to Costco and finished purchasing beer and cheese, and also ordered the pics for the centerpiece frames.  Two items down, 200 to go.  Let's see, 200 divided by 20.  I'm not so good at math, but I think that means I need to stop writing and start sewing ribbons to pillows. 

Decisions Mahalo Style

How DOES one choose which Hawaiin islands to go to, and how long to stay on each?  Oh, and then, how do you further narrow down to decide which area of an island you should make home base?  Too many awesome possibilities, not enough decisiveness.  I know, I know, such a horrible problem to have. ;-)

That's How the Meatball Crumbles...

 It started out as SUCH a good day, and stayed that way for so much of it.  Why did I have to test my luck and start a major project after a very late dinner?  I should have realized I'd used up all the good in my day and quit while ahead. 

Upon waking, I ignored the rain and my grumbling tummy and worked out.  Yeah me.  The Colbert Report happened to be on when I got on the elliptical.  Score.  Made a yummy breakfast using only my Community Shared Agriculture (CSA), all-organic goodies.  Ok, still on track. 

My soon-to-be sis-in-law (SIL) and I decided it was too rainy to go all the way to Springfield for wedding relating shopping, instead starting our day in Historic Occoquan, with lunch on the river.  Our visit there yielded a veil at Labella's, affordable petals for the flower girls in the form of Larkspur at the witch store and yummy pie at Mom's Apple Pie (totally un-wedding related, but oh so good!). 

On to Nordstrom's, where I got sensational deals on wedding shoes-- finally!-- and two "reception dress" options, with some guidance from SIL and her two fashionistas-in-training daughters.  Michael's turned up ribbon on clearance, gifts for the kids in the wedding and bubble wands for the flower girls who weren't feeling flower tossing.  Plus, it was an awesome day of bonding and general girliness.  Having only been exposed to boys, it was a small miracle to be around children who....wait....LOVE TO SHOP!!!  I was ready to stop before they were.  Beautiful.

Getting home at 8:30, I manage to whip a very successful experiment for dinner-- lemon curry fried chicken.  Seconds for all, leftovers for none.  Nice.  This is the point where I let all the good luck go to my head, and decide we should make meatballs for the reception.  200 of them.  At 10:30 pm.  The first obstacle comes when we realize the air conditioner is not working and we are about to add oven heat to steaming cauldron of our kitchen.  In a last minute save, Kevin flips the breakers at 11:00, managing to turn the air back on.  When in doubt, reboot!

Next, I open the oven and remember that I only have one rack.  Crud.  I call my friend across the street, who generously agrees to let me take her oven racks.  Great!  Except, they turn out to be too wide. 

With 85 of the meatballs rolled, it it too late to turn back.  K and I squish the rows and overlap two pans.  Now, in the back of mind, I realize that these lipless pans will drip.  Somehow, I do not realize that these drips will CATCH FIRE, turning my house into a carcinogenic, smokey mess at 11:30 pm.  After a dramatic ordeal complete with a window lock breaking during the airing out process, we get the flames and food out of the oven.  Still, the smoke lingers so we retreat upstairs to find....dog poo.  Ugh.  Why oh why did I not listen to my much more practical fiance who thought 10:30 was maybe a TEENY bit late to play Martha Stewart??

The moral is:  Luck is not limitless.  In the words of the great Kenny Rogers, you gotta know when to hold 'em, know when fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run.  When a crazy bride instinct tells you to play caterer with a barely functioning oven in a sauna-like kitchen at 10:30 pm after a long day of shopping...RUN...to bed.  Which is where I am finally headed, thank goodness!   

My Exciting Weekend, or cake plates & centerpieces

My Friday Night:

Painting platters white for the cupcake stand.  The goal is to make simple catering platters to look more like the very pretty plate that I bought for the top tier.   Goal #2:  Make sure that the less sturdy plates on the bottom do not break under the weight of the heavier plate on top. 




My Saturday Night:

Painting frames for the centerpieces.  Trying to add some colors to the tables with the frames and personalizing things a bit with the pictures.  My lesson for the night is that stamps work best with stamp pads.  Brushing paint on to them makes for a lot of guesswork!





Sneak preview of cupcake stand:

Was going to support the tiers with brass candlesticks I found for $.25 each at a yard sale last weekend.  But during this weekend's yard sale adventures, I found glass candlesticks that work even better with the white.   (Yard saling has become a weekly a ritual for my mother and I.  Good bonding time, but makes for sleepy Saturday mornings!)  I'm trying to decide if I'm feeling the purple flowers I experimented with on the base.  Hmm...Oh well, plenty of other things to do until I make up my mind.

Meeting of Musical Minds

Ok, as excited as I am to see Tom Petty this Sunday at The Lube (and Crosby, & Stills, & Nash...woo hoo!), I've decided maybe I'm not so excited to try to keep tempo with "Here Comes My Girl" as I nervously make my way down the aisle.  While Tom is still invited to the reception, I have decided to invite another man to walk me down the aisle.  The esteemed Mr. Billy Joel, circa 1977.  "She's Got a Way" is one of my FAVORITE songs by the piano man; the one that always made me mist up a bit, wishing that one day I'd have somebody who had that depth of emotion, those same feelings of awe, for me.

I float the idea by K, who makes me walk down the "aisle" of our kitchen to make sure it works, which it does, beautifully.  Then, he shares a secret.  It turns out that in the first version of his vows, the one that was scrapped for being a little too heavy on song lyrics, was mainly based on that song.  So see, I found the man who wants to sing that song to me.  With the help of our MP3 player, that is. 

He's searching out the "best" version of the song as I type.  I guess the song won't be a suprise, but the version will be. :) 

Bridesmaid Dresses Thus Far

Just a quick update of the bridesmaid dresses.  Three down, two to go. Just talking to Liz about doing the napkins in varying shades of purple as well, sort of reflecting the spectrum approach being applied to the dresses.  Both an artistic statement and a way to adapt to the fact that I probably do not have enough material of the dark purple to do all the napkins after all. Shh, don't tell!

"I Do" To DIY: Prelude to a Countdown...1 month, 1 day til showti...

"I Do" To DIY: Prelude to a Countdown...1 month, 1 day til showti...: "Tomorrow is one day until one month to go until The Big Day. That's right, I'm the kind of girl who does a countdown TO the countdown. Sud..."

Prelude to a Countdown...1 month, 1 day til showtime

Tomorrow is one day until one month to go until The Big Day.  That's right, I'm the kind of girl who does a countdown TO the countdown.  Suddenly all those projects I was going to put off until closer to the wedding have come leaping from my to-do list into my waking nightmares of trying to stuff 100 pounds of crap into a 10 pound bag. 

Ok.......first order.........breathe.  Better.

In the beginning, there was a lovely purple pillow that I could not wait to use as for our ring bearer.  So much so, that it became the driver for the color pallette.  Until there were two.  Ring bearers that is.  Which began the search for two pillows.  The purple beaded beauty that had been my inspiration would be impossible to duplicate.  I decided that "closer to the wedding" I would find fabric I loved as much and just sew some pillows.  Yesterday being MUCH closer to the wedding, I spent a fruitless hour purusing fabric at Jo Ann's.  The only thing that jumped out at me was $20/yard, of course.  I went home empty handed.

Today, I started going through files I'd favorited at the beginning of my wedding planning.  Low & behold, I stumbled across this project (right) by Laurie Cinotto of lalalaurie.  Loved it, and I even had spanish moss just begging for a project!

This led me to Village Thrift Store in search of scrap fabric for the pillow's bottom. Instead, I found something that made me scrap my plans and go for simplicity.  Two silk pillow shams, perfectly sized, the exact right shade of sage to offset my purples, with delicate golden embroidered edges.  From India.  For $.63 each!!!  I then searched out a plump, scruffy chair cushion to pull batting from, at the blue light special price of $.45.  That's right, my one-of-a-kind ring bearer pillows will cost me just over $3 (the ribbon will likely be some I got from Freecycle) and a bit of imagination.  Score! 

I also picked up 4 yards of scrap fabric in a deep purple.  This should work for making napkins, with the help of pinking shears.  I know that sewn edges would be lovely, but I only have 1 month & 1 day to go, must get moving!!!

On Regrets & Turbo Snakes

With the sending of the invites came our first gifts, and our first regrets.  Friday we received a card from old family friends of my parents, sending their love, regrets and...a reminder of the fragility of life.  I have not seen them in years, and remember them as an active, outspoken, resourceful couple from Pennsylvania.  Now, they are still outspoken and resourceful, but a trip from the Florida town that they retired to is simply too much activity.  Soon after came a card from Kevin's grandmother, who reminded me that her grandson is quite a catch, and also let us know she and his grandfather would not be able to make the trip up.  I expect a similar message from my grandparents in PA in the near future.

If only we had a private jet, or a time machine...These are people not only who love us and would throw lots of postitive energy our way, they are also inspirational.  All count their anniversaries in decades rather than years.  They have weathered sickness and health, the ups and downs of trying to get two people to fit into one relationship.  In this day when so many walk away rather than fight, it would be nice to look out and see these couples hand in hand silenty reminding us that lasting love is not just for fairy tales.  Maybe my IT-fiance can configure a web cam or some other way to let them "be there" from afar. 

And now to totally change the tone-- we got our first wedding gift today; Liz wanted to be the first.  Backing up a bit; we went to Target just before closing time on a Sunday because we were told we *must* register at least one brick & mortar store.  We were sleepy and hungry, and just started pointing that registry laser gun at all sorts of random things.  The height of randomness being when I aimed it at...a Turbo Snake for the drain.  When Kevin questioned my sanity, I defended its practicality, especially at the rate my curls clog up the drain.  That is how our first gift as an about-to-be-married couple came to be a snake for our drains.  Turns out, it now seems way more humorous than practical.  But I'm sure it will prove its value in the very near future!

Bobbling Along, Let the Crafting Begin

I went to Michael's for the first time since starting the wedding madness.  At 8:40.  20 minutes before closing.  What was I thinking?  Needless to say, I'd barely started exploring the possibilities before being kicked out.  Or maybe that was for the best. 

I ALMOST bought this way cool shimmery green ribbon overlaid with a shimmery purple one to top the Ball jars.  Sadly, however, they were not BOGO as I'd thought, and I'd already promised the 40% off coupon to my son for some type of mask.  Bummer.  Will have to hit up friends for their Sunday ads and go back prepared to shop!  

Of course, I didn't leave empty handed.  I now have the following items waiting for me to put to discover their true calling:

• Paintable, plaster bobble heads with picture frame faces.  Cake toppers...TOO cheesey? 
• Purple & white flowers that I'd like to use for hair accessories...somehow
• A leaf stamp.  This one is simple, for decorating some wooden Ikea frames that will house pictures of us...as kids? now?  both? 

Also started soaking wine bottles to remove the labels, so we can put them on the tables as water bottles.  Decorative touch, or excuse for drinking?  You be the judge. 

Ooh, after a kick-butt Santana concert last night (is there any other kind?) featuring an amazing cover of Sunshine of Your Love, I'm leaning towards that for our song as we "leave" the ceremony.  Or maybe I should save it for when everybody can baila, baila, baila. 

One Bride's Trash Is Another's Kid Craft

Freecylce is the best thing since Craigslist.  For those not in the know, it is a community of people GIVING STUFF AWAY to each other, with a goal of keeping useable items out of the landfill.  Users are expected to give as much as they get, creating a circle of found treasures and sharing. 

Of course, there is a catch.  You can't be picky.  If somebody lists "box of wedding" stuff, you take the box.  No leaving the ribbon you don't like on their porch while skipping away with the goodies.  You take it all, freecycle what you don't need and the circle rolls on.

Needless to say, I've been much more interested in Freecycle these last few months.  A recent box I picked up came with quite a few useful items, including unused wedding bubbles and iron-ons like "Team Bride" and "Ring Security" (we are making t-shirts for the kids & guys to wear under their shirts for when they are ready to de-formalize).  And magnets. More than 20.  With their wedding announcements on them.  So.....now what? Now...magnet projects for the kids to keep them amused during the reception, that's what!  A hot glue gun and a few sheets of sturdy stationary later, these babies will be ready for the kids to turn into custom art pieces at a craft table set up in the trees.  Of course, their medium will be color pencils.  No markers, paint or meltable crayons allowed at the wedding.  Would like the art to stay on the paper and off my dress, thank you very much. ;-)

Furthur...Progress on the Wedding Front

July 11th Kevin & I had a jinx moment, when I texted him "Only two months to go!"  He'd been about to text me the same thing (awww).  We quickly moved from thinking that was cute to realizing "Holy crap, ONLY two months."  Since then, our motivation levels have doubled.  In the last 10 or so days we have:

• Printed & mailed invites
• Updated the wedding site (ha, AFTER I learned that people were receiving our invites which only offer online RSVP...& THEN realized I needed to upload the guest list for it to work)

• Bought wedding shoes-- verdict still out if the heels are "sinkers" 
• Ordered wedding ring from Silverwood on Etsy; will be like the one pictured but in silver with white sapphires
• Started talking to a travel agent about cruise honeymoons
• Had an initial meeting with my seamstress
• More or less finalized the menu

No wonder I'm so tired!! :)  Oh, and my coup...yesterday, my friend Liz was on the lookout for blue mason jars for my centerpieces.  We were both disappointed that her journeys found the jars ranging from $8-$22!!  Apparently rustic charm comes with an upscale price tag. I resigned myself to the possibility of going with the new, clear canning jars K had bought for, well, canning.  Pickles and salsa might have to wait until after the wedding.

An hour later, I'm doing my slightly obsessive daily search for wedding items on Craigslist when lo & behold, I find a girl selling THIRTY blue mason jars for only $3 each.  I picked up half of them, bringing us to 20 jars.  Yeah!

Another great find this week...I wanted to do gazpacho shooters, but only if I could find reasonably priced glasses to serve them.  It wouldn't make sense to spend more on the cups than the soup!  After debating a variety of servingware online and in stores, K had the perfect suggestion.  Large tea lights from Ikea, which sell for about $.50 each.  They are clear, so people can see the pop of color, & they hold about 3 oz of liquid.  Perfecto!  Better yet...we picked up 50 of these babies on another CL run.  Will supplement as needed, only want to use the brand new ones, but great solution.  There, the secret is out-- I AM marrying K for his brains.  Not that the looks hurt either. :)

Now we just have to keep up this pace for another 7 weeks! 

Music Project Initiated

The Music Project was officially launched this weekend, with my handing the Magic USB key to our friend Dave, a bit of a musical encyclopedia. 

Over the next few weeks, the MUSB will be a musical vagrant, passed from one friend to another, each with a simple assignment:  Add great music.  I've set up various folders, love songs, late night, dance, etc, etc to hopefully make it easier to sort through the musical quilt that will make its way back to me.

My goal is dual:  Build a diverse play list, and ensure that key guests will be able to look forward to hearing songs they love.  Also, it will be interesting to see who adds what...I look forward to seeing what everyone comes up with!  :)

We Request The Presence Of...

After ignoring several emails from my intended insisting that we MUST write the invitations (he is right, I am the one who created the timeline, it just seemed so cliche, so something to do LATER, any day but today).  Alas, at home, there is no stack of paperwork to hide behind. 

It was a bumpy start, using other invitations and trying to edit them to my taste and then being entirely dissatisfied.  Until I remembered a recent epiphany:  It is often easier to start from scratch then build on the foundation of others.  And so I just wrote.  Think I pretty much nailed it.  When K read the intro he asked if he could "borrow" the words for the vows.  I told him fine as long as he doesn't mind my using the word plagarism in mine. :) 

Ok, here's the meat of it:

Fate kept our paths parallel but uncrossed, until the day that we each stepped slightly off center, together discovering a new road with no speed limits, no stop lights…simply our hearts whispering “go.”


Your friendship and love have been an important part of our journey-- please join us, Kevin Parr and Emily Guerrero, together with our families, as we pledge to travel the road of life together…

Of course, then I started thinking of yin and yang, how our differences balance, etc, etc.  Since he really IS my yin, K put the brakes on my OCD tendencies and insisted he loved the present version, saving me from hours of completely unneccessary re-writes of a document that will ultimately line recycle bins.  Well, I hope.  If our invites are not treasured, I hope that they are at least given new life.  Hmm...maybe THAT should go on the invite.  K is in bed now, nobody to keep the OCD in check, look out keyboard!

The Shoes Confuse...or, the art of compromise

These Badgley Mischka's on http://www.shoes.com/ make me swoon, as do these Carlos "come hither" babies below.  Of course, I'd topple & fall, lasting all of 15 minutes in either.  Oh, but what a glorious 15 minutes they would be!  While my favorite pair of shoes EVER are cute but rugged, ridicously verstalie Tevas, when it comes to dressing up, as far as shoes go, I take the "up" part seriously.  How can a shoe be pretty without heels?  Without effortless firming of your calf and instantly propelling you to the height of a supermodel? 

Alas, mine is a outdoor wedding.  I tried searching for flats, but, um, NO.  I'd rather go barefoot, or in the aforementioned Tivas.  That is making a statement-- confidently stating, "I treasure comfort."  Flats that try to be sexy are posers, & if the flats are ugly, well, why not make my statement & be truly in my comfort zone, bare tootsies & all?

Ok, so then wedges.  Surely there are some pretty wedges.  The search began, and YES, there are but there is a catch.  For some reason, most of them have cork, rope or wood (or faux versions of this trifecta) heels.  Which is awesome. For my beach vacation, music fest, etc, etc.  But when combined with gown, well, it might as well be flats. 

Enter Heels Above, a plastic cover for heels that would keep the dirt off & hopefully keep me from sinking in.  The search for compromise heels begins-- maybe a little chunkier 2-ish inches, nothing crazy.  Found some contenders, the Steve Madden Goldwyn was the leader.  Shortish heel, adorable rosettes really comfie for a heeled satin shoe, oh & on clearance.  Catch-- they were black.  And as much as I'm incorporating some nontraditional aspects,  not sure how that works with the ivory gown.  I took down the model # prepared to find it some festive color online.  Only to find that the only colors are gold and silver, in leather, and for twice as much as the clearance pair I saw.  Not feeling it in the leather, so back to the drawing board.  Or back to the compromise board, rather.

Ack! Or, Issues with the Wedding Items I'd Counted On

Long time no post...illness, funerals, fighting the bank tooth & nail on mortgage issues (THAT is its own blog!!! may be coming soon), company merging, blah, blah, blah.  In short, the wedding sort of slipped to the backburner.  But, with three months to go, the heat turned up and there are whiffs of smoke curling off that unwatched pot.  Wait, what's that sound?  Think the fire alarm just went off...time to pull wedding pans off that burner and put them front and center again.

Ok, metaphors off.  In real life, the "alarm" came in the form of an email from St. Anthony's Bridal.  Remember the not-for-profit I waxed poetic about?  The place I was counting on for EVERY major wedding item-- table linens, dishes, chafing dishes, vases, runners? 

Back up.  Revel in the suspense, and the foreshadowing.   Three nights in a row, I had variations of the same nightmare.  Sometimes it was the day of the wedding, sometimes it was a month out, but, always, it was late in the game, go time, and...I did not have anything for the wedding.  Sometimes nobody remembered to go to St. A's.  Each dream, it came down to the wire and I did not have what we needed. In one version, we are hustling to buy food from McDonald's because we have no chafing dishes for our food (I HATE fast food!!).  I know, I know, brides to be have bad wedding dreams.  I get it.  But, really, the wedding was off the radar right then.  And I'm not the wedding nightmare type.  Really.  It felt premonition-y. Like any half-sane persion, I shook it off, chalked it up to wedding stress.  Even though I wasn't stressing.  Until....

...the email.  From St. Anthony's.  That said somebody would have my wine glasses & other items until Sept. 10.  Six days after the planned pick-up date, and the day before my wedding, when everyone I love and could count on will be in Lake Anna with me.    And (wait, it gets better), somebody needed all of my stuff from me on Monday, Sept. 13.  Five days before they are due.  As if I'm going to get everything washed and ready two days after the wedding.  Oh, and as if I can make it to Bethesda on a Monday, after taking time off for MY WEDDING.

Ugh, groan, grumble.  I'm sure their heart is in the right place, and they are trying to help as many brides as possible.  But instead, St. Anthony's is putting in me in the position of letting myself be screwed or being the scrooge bride who argues against sharing.  Which, the whole point of the place is sharing, I love that about the place.  I had every intention of donating some wedding items to them (and my mom was going to write them a check) because I love the whole concept and that this place even exists.  However, we have a signed contract stating specific pick-up/drop-off times, and it is unfair that they have now offered the items to these other brides.  Especially the one the day before MY wedding, which was booked first.  I've emailed the Sept. 10 girl and St. Anthony's....waiting for a response. They are slow on the email, I get it, but starting to panic a bit.  Leaning towards forgetting the whole thing and shopping the yard sale circuit to get what I need wedding-wise.  There is something to be said for being in control.  In fact, it is one of my favorite things.  Is it worth it to trade that control for free items and the "green-ness" of the St. A's concept?  Or is control PRICELESS....????  Ok, there's an actual dollar price in this case, but maybe it is more of an investment (in my peace of mind) vs. an expense. 

In closing.........ACK.

Taking My Rain Sunny Side Up

There are many noted benefits of gardening.  Relaxation, exercise, fresh air, an instant bond with fellow dirt-diggers, and, if you are sprouting some veggies, knowing where your food comes from. Powerful stuff.  Also on the "pro" list-- a changed relationship with the weather. 

Saturday's overcast start was an incentive to hurry home and get in zinnias and other green goodies purchased at a yard sale from The Tomato Man (more on him later).  The rain, then humidity, then rain that followed? Victory!  My plants were ready and waiting to soak it all in.  Instead of scowling at the clouds, which I often do, I did a little happy dance knowing this meant less watering work for me and a better chance of flourishing for my growables.

Don't get me wrong, I still hit snooze an extra time for each rain drop.  But it was nice to feel CONNECTED to the rain, to be able to recognize all the good stuff it brought along, frizzy hair be damned.  That's what pony-tails are for! 

Ah, and The Tomato Man, he is one of my best yard sale discoveries ever.  First of all, he was selling great plants, organically grown for super low prices.  A snow-related collapse of his greenhouse meant his plants were smaller and there were discounts to be had.  As we chatted and I told of him my goal to grow wedding flowers, he not only recommended ones that would be perfect for cutting and would bloom well into the fall (thus, the zinnia purchase), but gave me his card and offered his greenhouse for starting more flowers for my project.  He even gave me tips on some of the flowers I am already growing. 

Ok, so bond with fellow growers--- pro.  Being able to enjoy the rain--- pro.  Nervously checking and rechecking frost warnings for tonight--- well, I said a CHANGED relationship with the weather. Not a perfect one. ;-) 

Wedding Wire...Final Destination

I am the Goldilocks of finding the wedding website that fits "just right."  I started no fewer than 5 sites for us, and looked at features of 10 others.  Yes, I am a bit OCD.  Yes, I could have created a site from scratch using a blog site or weebly in all that time.  In fact, I started those too. :)

I thought my requirement list was simple enough:

• Cool templates (um, duh)
• Ability to hyperlink
• Option to edit in HTML
• Collect online RSVPs (I know could use an outside tool, but really wanted one-stop shop)
• Flexiblity to lay out pics where I want, change fonts as needed, etc
• FREE, FREE, FREE. 

Sadly, when you google "best wedding website," you get sponsor articles.  Wedding message boards were more of a help, but a perfect site for one person could be a disaster for another.  I am at a dangerous stage in my web knowledge-- I know too much to be satisfied with filling out a data form that autopopulates my site, but not enough to start from scratch on a cool template.  I wanted to be in control, but have somebody else do the grunt work.

After MUCH searching, I'm rebuilding our site for the last time.  No, really.  I swear.  Our wedding info can now be found on www.weddingwire.com/KevEm.  It is free.  It lets me manipulate code if I actually feel like it.  It has RSVP functionalities, will post RSS feeds from my blog, has photo albums, lets guests make song requests...you can pick and choose which of these apps to utilize.  A great cross between simplicity and flexibility.  Would definitely recommend.

Mission: Wedding Recon

Yes indeedy, looks like a perfect weekend to do some wedding recon down at the lake!  I'll pack up my laser measuring tape, a list of restaurants that cater and a handful of Claritin.  Should be all set! 

I'm looking forward to filling in some blanks.  It will be good to get a better idea of the yard layout and  parking.  Plus, we can look at restaurants, lodging, etc online as much as we want, but some things just need to be seen. Or in some cases, tasted.  Plus, this wknd marks the 3rd anniversary of our 1st date (I forgot...K sent me flowers. Aww:-), so the trip will double as a romantic get away.  Heck, maybe we'll just elope while we are down there.  Then I will never have to decide what to do about bridesmaids dresses or playlists.  Kidding, I can't WAIT to do the playlist.  I write it in my head all the time as I'm driving down the road.  Looking very forward to starting The Music Project.  More on that one later!

In the meantime, must decide between rustic camping cabin or B&B for Saturday night.  Looking for a place to stay this weekend has been a bit of a wake up call.  For my non-camper guests, lodging options will be limited.  Hopefully people will heed my warning to book early & often.       

Picture Perfect

So  happy right now!  Another huge check off the list, and in just the right way!

Through work, I have become friends with the couple that runs a graphic arts company, ImageWerks.  The wife, Kathy, is an amazing photographer.  Of course, I had immediately thought of her for our photos, but...I wanted her to have the option to just CHILL on our big day.  So while I wanted to ask her, I did not want to create any sense of obligation by doing so.  Ah, the politics of wedding planning. :)  Tonight the stars aligned, when Kathy made the offer to be our photog.  Lots of hugs and me almost crying with joy (literally) later, we have a photographer, and I couldn't be happier! 

I can breathe easy, knowing that our memories are in safe hands.  I already know that she has a fantastic perspective and will pick up the meaningful little moments in our ceremony and reception.  Better yet...I have another ally, another person I trust and love who will be on the wedding journey with us.  Who knew me "BK" (before K) and has the history to know that he really IS the best man I have ever known.  She is somebody who truly appreciates our love story.  Kathy has been asking me when we will get married almost since she met him.  As she puts it, "He's your soul mate."  (She says it in this very no-nonsense, all-knowing way that makes the statement an irrefutable fact.  Love it!)   THAT is exactly the energy I want to be surrounded by on our wedding day.  :-)

Let it Grow! Arrival of the Seeds

The upside of ordering my seeds online was the variety. Home Depot is not exactly known for its array of organic and/or heirloom seeds. Good luck finding purple cauliflower there! The downside has been the wait. This last rainy weekend, I kept wishing I had my plants in the ground, ready to soak it all in.



Today, the wait is over. Well, the first part. :) Next comes planting, then hoping and waiting they grow. Followed by waiting and hoping to see if the blooms will last until our Septembember nuptials. Welcome to wedding planning on the edge.

So, if all goes well, my wedding will be full of fresh:

• Cosmos Rose Bon Bon
• Morning Glory - Star of Yelta

• Echinacea
• Painted Daisy
• Double Shirley Poppy
• Giant Aster

Should make for pretty garden as well!  Most of these start to bloom by late spring and keep on truckin' until the fall or even first frost.  In theory.  So they can be a good choice for weddings in the summer too, up through mid-fall.  In case anybody else wants to wait until the last second to know if they'll have flowers or not. :)

Can Mismatched Be Cohesive? A Dress Dilemma

When it came to bridesmaid dresses, I knew what I did NOT want:

• A cattlecall at David's Bridal, where everybody is shuffled into overpriced, cookie cutter dresses
• To make my bridesmaids overspend on dresses that they would secretly hate me for
• Four mirror images lined up in my photos

Ok, "not wants"-- easy to determine.  Narrowing down the wants-- a little trickier.  My first thought was that all the 'maids could each go and find a dress in a color I chose.  Until I realized that ever-so-slightly different shades of purple might look off-key.  Then I thought I'd match two and two of the group, providing a little more room for variation.  I tried to think of what colors would work for this, and then began feeling overwhelmed, not wanting to put anybody in a "bad" color or style and  ended up making no choices at all.  I found myself thinking, "Maybe I should just let them where what they want."  But I knew that was not completely what I wanted. 

I've now taken a few steps back and a deep breath. Looking at dress options online w/ 'maid Liz, we stumbled across a photo from Nordstrom's (above) where nothing matched in a traditional sense-- three different designers, different colors, different styles, but it was looked great nonetheless.  A google search for "mismatched bridesmaids" later, and we were on to something.  As you can see in this pic from polkadotbride, you don't have to have carbon copy bridesmaids to have a cohesive look.

Now, I also ran across examples that in my humble opinion did not work.  I won't post pics, but I started to notice common themes in what did not work. (Focusing on "do nots" really can get you to "do's"....eventually.)  Discordant colors; I think a pallette or complimentary color scheme should be in play on some level.  Different levels of formality; the style should resonate on some level.  In one instance, three bridesmaids frame the bride in satiny, cocktail length dresses, but all I could see was the fourth girl, who looked like she had stumbled in from a luau.  On its own, there was nothing wrong with her flower print, rather shapeless, cotton, ankle length dress.  But when paired with the others, I almost heard the sound of a record scratching and everything coming to a halt.  Would've been great at a beach wedding, but clearly, this had been a more formal event.  I would have said length should be similar, but in the sample above, the one long gown still fits beautifully with the rest of the dresses.

Which brings us to my do's.  Which are incredibly tentative.  There must be connective items...this can be color, material, length, hairpieces, shoes, jewelry, shawls...the list goes on.  The point is, it does not have to be the dress itself that builds a connection.  In the image at right, from kvetch.indiebride, the dresses don't match, but their theme does.  They all have a vintage throw back feel.  On closer look, you'll also notice that their headbands, pearls, gloves and lipstick are coordinated. The result?  Unique dresses that result in a pulled together look.  Love it!

Now...to decide what will cordinate my 'maids.  Color?  Dress length? Material? Flowy, bohemian dresses?  A removable forhead tattoo that declares, "KevEm Wedding Party?"  Ooh, removable tats could play a role, since they all have a few anyway....the possibilities are endless. Of course, endless possibilities are not always a good thing for those of us who tend to overthink things.  My poor friends may not be able to start dress shopping for months. ;-)

Dresses, A Disclaimer

As I drove to work, I found myself mulling over last night's post, and wanted to add a quick disclaimer. When I say finding "THE dress," I am not endorsing the notion that every girl has an elaborate gown out there, just waiting to make her feel like a princess, or that this dress must be found at all costs.  What I am saying is that by searching around, you can find something that feels just right FOR YOU.  For me, part of what felt "just right" was staying within my budget.  I would not have been truly happy with anything that I overspent on.  For others, just right could mean a bright red sun dress.  The concept of THE dress is situational, which is what makes it obtainable.  And that concludes my thoughts on wedding dress shopping. :)

Savoring the Taste of...My Own Words

Ok, so I have to eat the words from my last post.  True love-- of a wedding dress-- found me this weekend. 

After a 45 minute drive to Rockville, MD and an odd entrance that involved going through the lobby of Dogtopia, I arrived at St. Anthony's Bridal.  This place is nothing short of a miracle! They are a not-for-profit that help brides have an affordable, beautiful wedding day.  Brides that meet their criteria can borrow a dress, decorations, plates, runners, just about everything for........no charge.  Zip.  Nada.  To qualify, you must:

1. Plan to have fewer than 100 guests.
2. Have a budget of under $3,000 for the reception.
3. Be within 60 miles of the shop.

Don't meet these criteria, or want to own your dress?  Only $150 buys any dress in the store!  And these are great gowns; many are designer.  Most are either samples or last season's dresses donated by high-end boutiques, or "worn once" dresses from area brides.  Buying the dress, vs. borrowing, also helps to fund this amazing place, a godsend for budget brides in the DC metro area.  And the volunteers are super supportive, really, they treated me as well as any boutique.  These are people who love weddings, love brides and just want to help you acheive a perfect day without going into debt. 

I also reserved TONS of great items that will allow my reception to come in at $3,000-- plates, linens, centerpieces, even a chocolate fountain!  This translates into us being able to self-cater most of the food without paying for expesenive rentals of chafing dishes, etc.  Also, it is even greener than my original plan of buying biodegradable plates and cups, since nothing will be disposable. 

Ok, I got off topic raving about St. Anthony's. :)  Back to my point...THE Dress.  It was the first one I put on when we got there and I literally sighed when I looked in the mirror.  It just felt right.  And I felt beautiful.  Finally.  Very Grace Kelly; intricate beading on top, flowing into a sleek A-line.  I plan to have the train removed but, otherwise, it fits perfectly.  I tried on a few more because I like to be thorough, but I knew it was THE one.  So, I must eat my words.  There really is such a thing as putting on a dress and just falling in love.  And the good news is, if you are willing to shop around, and maybe explore some less traditional avenues, you can accomplish it while staying on budget.  A happily-ever-after ending to my search for a perfect dress.

Finding "The One"

Even now, late at night, as my house sleeps around me, I hear them.  Their wise voices, mystically chanting:

"You will just know."

"It will feel right."

"The One will find you."

I'm not talking about finding true love.  No, if only it were that easy.  I'm talking about finding............THE dress.  Maybe if I was one of the $10,000 dress budget girls on "Say Yes to the Dress," the task would be easy.  For $10k, lots of great dresses will happily find you.  For budget of $400 or less (preferably much, much less), I am resigned to consign, haunting Craigslist, oncewed.com and my favorite consignment boutique, LaBella Bridal.  I keep looking for "new" dresses at each, hoping that my size, ever-changing taste and budget will one day align. 

The first dress I tried on, back in February, was an Alvina Valenta beauty (left), made of duchess silk with hand-sewn details.  Don't let the picture fool you-- put on a real-live person, steamed and with crinoline, GORGEOUS.  And, sadly, $450 out of my price range.  Also, I was not sure if I wanted to be quite that, well, fancy or buy the very first dress I tried on. 

A wedding planner advised me that if it was question of a few hundred dollars, I could make that up somewhere else in the wedding, like the favors.  Which is solid advice, except that keeping my costs down is SO important to me.  I just don't want to feel wasteful.  On the other hand, I am beginning to be wasteful of my time, as I keep searching for The One. 

My latest trip to LaBella resulted in conflicting favorties from each bridesmaid, and support for EVERY dress from a very nice group of women there for their own dresses.  They provided a lovely ego boost, but did nothing for my confusion.  The bride in their group bought a dress that, quite frankly, made ME start to cry even though I didn't know her from Margaret Thatcher.  I'd overheard her mom say they had been searching for quite awhile, but that this dress was The One.

Anxious for guidance, I asked her how she had found it.  "I tried on a hundred dresses.  I even bought another dress.  But I put this one on, and I just knew."

So far all I know, is this dress finding is more work than it should be.  I do have Plan B, the $100 Ebay dress.  It is actually lovely, an Alfred Sung chiffon A-line with a sweetheart neck.  (Ha, I knew NONE of these terms a few months ago!!)  But, it's just not........The One.  Still, I'm about ready to  let it be the one I end up wearing so I can move on with my life. 

In Sickness & In Health

I think if we need to reduce the word count for the ceremony, we are safe cutting "in sickness & health."  It is almost redundant after this weekend.  In addition to the occassional chicken soup & TLC that is part of any relationship, we are now 1-1 for accompanying each other to the local hospital. 

In my case, I was a willing patient.  If things are not feeling right, I'm all about the better safe than sorry.  K, on the other hand, suffers from an unfortunate chronic condition:  being a man.  Which meant a week of my begging him to get checked out before he finally relented (under intense peer pressure from our friends, I might add).  So rather than Urgent Care on Friday morning, we instead found ourselves at Potomac Hopsital at 10 pm on a Saturday.  Not exactly a traditional date night. 

That being said, I was glad to be there for him, and know that he truly appreciated my company and care.  K does not make you guess on these things; he is quick to show appreciation.  He's good at that positive reinforcement stuff. :)  Also, it was  a relief to see him doing a bit better and know that the task of unraveling the mystery of his labored breathing had finally started.  Hopefully by this time tomorrow, I'll be back to the routine of typing very, very quietly so as not to wake him with my night owl ways.  Ready to take a break from the sickness, & get back to the health part of our partnership.  That's the plan!

Finally, A Way To Incorporate My Wine Bottle "Collection"

At some point, many bottles ago, I started saving bottles to make wine lights.  The first iteration involved shoving the cord through the top.  They were pretty enough, but a bit primitive.  Eventually, I took the leap and bought a diamond drill bit, in an ill-fated attempt to make them Etsy-worthy & start a shop.  Here, the story takes a dark turn (get it, light/dark? Nevermind, I should sleep soon!!). 

The bottles were crazy hard to drill and the diamond bit wore out, as did my motivation.  Well, my motivation to actually DO something with the bottles.  Somehow, the motivation to SAVE them never died.  As space in my basement closet disappeared, I still convinced myself that I would pick up the old drill again any day now.  Fast forward a few months later, and the wine bottles have a purpsoe again.  They are crying out to be DIY centerpieces in our DIY wedding.  This would combine two of my favorite things:  recycling and rationalization. 

The question remained-- HOW would I put all of these empties to good use?  A simple idea is using them as water carafes on the tables, as shown here on re.nest.com:

While that idea is a keeper, I still wanted something that included put the "DO" in DYI.  Loved the idea of turning the bottles into vases (recycling, ratioalizing AND reducing costs-- now you're talking!), but all the methods I knew of were very time consuming and had a low success rate.  As in, you have to break a few bottles to get a good vase.

That's why I'm so excited to stumble across this video, demonstrating how to use a super simple method that reportedly works 90% of the time.  According to my new hero, Dan Roja, just follow these steps:

• 
  
  Score the bottle-- just one time around will do
• 
  
  Set a pot of water to boil
• 
  
  Place the bottle over a sink, with cool water available
• 
  
  Gently pour the boiling water over the score
• 
  
  Then, run cool water over the top
• 
  
  Repeat until-- POP!  The bottle separates

Of course, I'm paraphrasing.  If you are going to try this project, check the video for more specifics.  I can't wait to give this a try this soon; will report back.  I'd say I'll do it this weeked, but it's supposed to be 70 degrees, sunny AND there's an environomental film fest in DC.  Have a feeling I won't be home much. :) 

Wine bottles find new fab form & function at www.greenwinebottles.com. 

Mine will probably not look quite this good. :)

Everything's Coming Up Daisies...

...and Asters, and Cosmos, and Lavendar and other late blooming flowers.  Just ordered a bunch of seeds from The Bear Foot Shaman on Etsy, in preparation for "Operation Grow My Own Bouquet."  Incidentally, The Shaman has a great variety of flowers, heirloom veggies, medicinal herbs...highly recommend a "trip" to her shop to get yourself thinking spring.  Found myself drooling at all the beautiful and exotic fruits & veggies featured.  Couldn't resist adding some purple cauliflower & a few tomatoes to my purchase (I really must get a bigger yard one of these days!!).

My plan is to start a bunch of seedlings, plant a few and then share the overflow with friends and family to plant as well.  Hedging my bets!  They get the gift of a colorful garden, I get the gift of flowers grown and tended with love.  Oh-- and a huge cost savings!  In theory.  Really counting on my friend who grew up running a garden center. Yes, Carl, the pressure is ON! 

Plan B is run to Trader Joe's at the last second and make a boquet from whatever they have on hand.  So...hoping for lots of sunshine, and a decent amount of rain, I suppose, this growing season.  Fingers crossed!

Borrowed from the Bear Foot Shaman's site:
"You can bury a lot of troubles digging in the dirt." - Unknown

Best Craigslist Trip Ever

It all started as a quest for a fantastic deal on paper lantern lights for the wedding.  For only $50 and a trip to Falls Church, we could have a box full of lantern lights; small, large, colored, white, almost 30 strands and several single "globes."  I'd done my homework, and knew that ONE colored strand retails for $13 at World Market. 


Deciding to make a night of it, we headed for dinner at Sweet Water Tavern and then made our way to.....the best CL trip EVER!  We followed the seller into her basement, which turned out to be a treasure trove.  As she dug out the lights, we got to chatting about our wedding, learning that it was going to have a lot in common with hers (lakeside, spending a few days at the lake beforehand, DIY, lot of friends/family help, budget).  Next thing you know, she was throwing in the EXACT pitchers I'd been looking for to serve sangria & lemonade, gorgeous wooden cutting boards for cheese and bread & other great items for our wedding.

Our purchase also "bought" us lots of great ideas and a healthy dose of inspiration.  She'd had her four-day, lakeside affair for only $3,000.  We saw pictures (she highly recommended her photographer-- what sounded like her big splurge for the event).  It looked like a beautiful wedding.  We've been stressing over various expenses, how hard it might be to self-cater, etc, etc.  She had tips on food that can be made ahead AND even on getting some aspects of the wedding sponsored.  Her success story was right on time!

Easter Finds for the Flower Girls

Another big "check" off the list; scored amazing deals on flower girl dresses for K's three nieces, by shopping the Easter dress selection at Marshall's.  Got three adorable ivory dresses-- satin tops, lacy, full bottom with a lace flower for only $30 each.  Comparable dresses at a nearby bridal boutique ran in the $100 range.  I guess timing IS everything.  Next up:  buying their flower baskets at the day after Easter sales. ;-)

A Picture is Worth....????

Oddly enough, my quest to be green (& save green!!) by combing the 'net for resale items to use in my wedding may have backfired from a budget perspective  Don't get me wrong, I'm finding deals & have even gotten great tips and good wishes from recent brides who have been there, done that.  However, as people send me pictures of their goods for sale, I am beginning to question my choice to not hire a photographer.

My original thought process was that I have enough amateaur shutterbugs on my guest list to just let the photo cards fall where they may.  I even considered setting up a laptop where guests will be encouraged to upload photos through out the event. 

But, as I see picture after picture of private moments poignantly captured for eternity, softly shaded  sideways glances, silent smiles that whisper "I'm so in love," flower girls caught doing cartwheels.......sigh.  Perhaps it would be smart to not leave the recording of this special day to chance.

Still, I have a budget to stick to.  I wonder if anybody has had any luck with using the services of new photographers looking to build their portfolio?  I'm picturing a smaller payment balanced by offering to promote their services to anybody willing to listen. :)  Ok, sounds like I have a NEW Craigslist mission to attend to!!

Defining A “Budget” Wedding

I’d always thought it was wasteful to blow a ton of money on weddings, which are, at the end of the day...well, just one day. We have a kitchen to remodel, a fence to build, vacations to plan...LOTS of days worth of projects to fund. No high-dollar wedding for us, no sir.
Confident that we could plan a fabulous wedding for $3,000, I began googling “budget weddings.” Imagine my surprise when people were patting themselves on the back for coming in under $25,000. My car costs less than that! Actually, that is my car + our van + his car!! (No judgement, just an eye opener.) Doing more research, the cheapest local venue that I saw was $1,200, IF you used their caterer.

Now, my goal may still have been achievable if our early statements about a guest list of 50 people had been on target. Instead, when we started typing names into our handy Excel spreadsheet, the total was closer to 50 names from EACH of us. Of course, there were also many little costs I just had not thought of. Things like forks and plates, for instance. Although, serving out of troughs would be one way to cut down the guest list…

So, a bit wiser, I have now reluctantly raised the budget to $6,000. Part of me feels guilty, like I’m “caving” to the "wedding industrial complex." On the other hand, I am not being extravagant, and things cost what they cost. Our list is too big for a backyard wedding, and the local parks do not allow alcohol. Or indoor plumbing, for that matter.

Which led us to the lake house…which, while our biggest single expenditure by far, is a bargain. For under $2,000, less than it would cost to rent a traditional venue/banquet hall for 5 hours, we get:

• Luxury accommodations for ourselves & entire bridal party
• A 4-fer…site for our rehearsal dinner, ceremony, reception AND after-party, where we can hang lakeside with our nearest & dearest post-reception. Did I mention the waterfront firepit?
• TONS of time to set up & breakdown, a huge plus for a DIY wedding
• Pre-honeymoon—with check-in 4 days prior to the wedding, we are going to take a few days to enjoy the lake alone together before our helpers join us
• A way to thank to our helpers, who also get to enjoy a weekend at the lake in an amenity-packed home

I could go on, but think this is enough to successfully rationalize the lake house expenditure. Which in turn lets me feel ok (mostly) with our $6,000 budget. Now the hard part—sticking to it!! But, I'm on the right track-- just ordered a wedding gown on Ebay for....drum roll please...$100 plus shipping. Fingers crossed that it looks as good in person as it does online.
So, in the end, I guess "budget" wedding is what you make of it. Are you getting value for your spending? Making use of your skills? Saying "no" from time to time? Utilizing Craigslist, Ebay, your best friend's attic? Spending within your means/NOT incurring debt? Maybe I'm just saying this as part of my rationalization process, but I think a budget wedding is more a state of mind than a number.

And so it starts...the new blog

I have decided to venture beyond the limitations of the blog built into our wedding website. While I'd still recommend http://www.momentville.com/ for its simplicity & good range of basic functionalities-- post pictures, imbed hyperlinks, play music (personally, not a fan of sites that blast music when I open them, but they have it if you want it...) & collect RSVP info all at no charge. However, I wanted a bit more flexibility for my blog. Now, let's see if I actually use it. :)

So, where did I leave off? We've gotten a few big items off the check list, which is good, because our wedding date is exactly 7 mos., 10 days after the proposal date. Which, at this point, means it is only 6 months away! No shotgun wedding scandals; I just didn't realize this was considered a short turn around for wedding planning. Especially one with a DIY/budget focus! The upside: less time to over analyze & sweat the small stuff.

Ok, progress report: We have found a lovely home in Lake Anna where we will hold the ceremony & reception. E-save the dates have been sent to key players. I am in talks with a local musician that I love & have even purchased the wine since Safeway was offering 30% off their entire selection. 18 bottles later, & I think we are set on that front. Three big wedding items down, only like 1,000 to go. Click here to read my earlier posts on finding a location & putting ONE DAY in perspective.