Defining A “Budget” Wedding

I’d always thought it was wasteful to blow a ton of money on weddings, which are, at the end of the day...well, just one day. We have a kitchen to remodel, a fence to build, vacations to plan...LOTS of days worth of projects to fund. No high-dollar wedding for us, no sir.
Confident that we could plan a fabulous wedding for $3,000, I began googling “budget weddings.” Imagine my surprise when people were patting themselves on the back for coming in under $25,000. My car costs less than that! Actually, that is my car + our van + his car!! (No judgement, just an eye opener.) Doing more research, the cheapest local venue that I saw was $1,200, IF you used their caterer.

Now, my goal may still have been achievable if our early statements about a guest list of 50 people had been on target. Instead, when we started typing names into our handy Excel spreadsheet, the total was closer to 50 names from EACH of us. Of course, there were also many little costs I just had not thought of. Things like forks and plates, for instance. Although, serving out of troughs would be one way to cut down the guest list…

So, a bit wiser, I have now reluctantly raised the budget to $6,000. Part of me feels guilty, like I’m “caving” to the "wedding industrial complex." On the other hand, I am not being extravagant, and things cost what they cost. Our list is too big for a backyard wedding, and the local parks do not allow alcohol. Or indoor plumbing, for that matter.

Which led us to the lake house…which, while our biggest single expenditure by far, is a bargain. For under $2,000, less than it would cost to rent a traditional venue/banquet hall for 5 hours, we get:

• Luxury accommodations for ourselves & entire bridal party
• A 4-fer…site for our rehearsal dinner, ceremony, reception AND after-party, where we can hang lakeside with our nearest & dearest post-reception. Did I mention the waterfront firepit?
• TONS of time to set up & breakdown, a huge plus for a DIY wedding
• Pre-honeymoon—with check-in 4 days prior to the wedding, we are going to take a few days to enjoy the lake alone together before our helpers join us
• A way to thank to our helpers, who also get to enjoy a weekend at the lake in an amenity-packed home

I could go on, but think this is enough to successfully rationalize the lake house expenditure. Which in turn lets me feel ok (mostly) with our $6,000 budget. Now the hard part—sticking to it!! But, I'm on the right track-- just ordered a wedding gown on Ebay for....drum roll please...$100 plus shipping. Fingers crossed that it looks as good in person as it does online.
So, in the end, I guess "budget" wedding is what you make of it. Are you getting value for your spending? Making use of your skills? Saying "no" from time to time? Utilizing Craigslist, Ebay, your best friend's attic? Spending within your means/NOT incurring debt? Maybe I'm just saying this as part of my rationalization process, but I think a budget wedding is more a state of mind than a number.